Cold

Cold.
My toes curled under the sheets,
Arms shivering,
I am cold.

Cold.
I see darkness where others see light,
What have I been doing wrong,
I am cold.

Cold.
It is a descent,
Slow and invisible,
I am cold.

Cold.
I know not why,
Just that it is,
I am cold.

Downhill

Inexplicably sad
Undeniably mad
Stare and breathe, stare and breathe
Never close to what I need

Inexplicably sad
Don’t ask why
Undeniably mad
Couldn’t tell anyone why

Inexplicably sad
Couldn’t take it easily
Undeniably mad
I’m not ready

Inexplicably sad
Everything hanging on a balance
Undeniably mad
Stare and breathe, stop the tears

Inexplicably sad
Undeniably mad
Stare and breathe, stare and breathe.

White-hot

Who would’ve thought love could be a white-hot pain in the chest
A pit in the stomach
And choking back tears.

The pounding won’t stop
The beast in my heart
Growling louder, heavier.
And it lurches
As tears flow slowly

And there’s something in my throat.

The fire, it’s back
And it clutches my fragile heart,
It hurts.

And my hands are numb
My toes are cold.

Everything’s dead
But the fire in my heart
Soon to consume me.

Ikaw ay Ako sa Kanya

Ikaw ay ako sa kanya.
Siya ay ako sa iyo.
Kung mayroon mang dapat aminin,
Yun ay di ko alam ang gagawin.

Siya sa akin ay siya sa iyo.
Siya sa iyo ay siya sa akin.
Laging nagbabaka-sakali,
Pabalik balik, parang kalye.

Ikaw ay ikaw,
At ako ay ako.
Noon ay may kami,
Mayroong kayo.
Nagkaroon ng tayo.
At kayo. At kami.

Wala na tayo.
Wala nang tayo.
Sino ba naman ako?

Siya ay hindi ako.
Siya ay hindi ikaw.
Titigilan ko na ito,
Tutal, nauna ka namang bumitaw.

1948

I could turn days into weeks into months
But when I see your name,
Why do I still care?

I could turn memories into stories into verses
But when I see your trace,
Why does it still ache?

I couls weave pain into words into poems
But when I notice your absence,
Why does it still hurt?

Nothing Hurts

Nothing hurts.
Nothing.
A hollow pit in my chest,
Paralyzing my palms;
Nothing hurts.

Nothing hurts.
Nothing.
A vast emptiness in my core,
A chasm beneath my feet.
Nothing hurts.

Nothing hurts.