The Morning After

It hurts so much
That there is nothing I wouldn’t do,
Yet nothing I could do
To keep you
To make you stay
Or make you love me still.

It hurts so much
That the good night’s
And I love you’s
Started coming less and less
Until they abruptly stopped.

It hurts so much
That every single thing
Is tied to the memory of you,
Of me, of us,
Of none of those anymore.

It hurts so much
That all the things you said
And promised,
All the things I believed,
Would have to be buried,
Away from remembering.

It hurts so much
That I trusted everything onto you,
The fact that you said you’d never leave,
And see it all crumbling before my eyes.

It hurts so much
That I lashed out every single feeling that I have–
Every sorrow, every joy,
Every anger, every love–
To you and only to you,
Confident in my thinking
That I could bare it all
Without you leaving.

It hurts so much
That I want nothing—
Nothing else but you
And I can’t have that
I can’t have you,
Not anymore.

It hurts so much
That I do not understand
Why it all came to this
How it all came to this.

It hurts so much
That there is nothing I can do
Because I believed you.

It hurts so much
To know,
To hear, to read
That you don’t know
If you love me still,
That I can do nothing, still–

It hurts so much
That in my dream
I was chasing you to be mine again,
Waking up to realize,
I don’t even get that chance,
To chase you, to fight for you,
I don’t even get that chance.

It hurts so much
But then again, this is me,
And my life that’s never meant to be happy,
My life that could get so high
Only to plunge back to where it came from.

This is life,
And the fact that it’d keep happening, I—
It hurts so much.
It hurts so much.

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