20Apr16

Let’s lay down all the rules, you and I
Tell me what makes you hope, what makes you sigh
Tell me what make you look up the sky;
Why you’re too scared to fly.

 

Let’s lay down all the rules, you and I
And I’ll tell you all there is to know,
The chest where all hidden words are kept,
Traces of tear on the last place I wept.

 

Let’s lay down all the rules, you and I
And break then one by one
Lay on the shattered glasses that keep us apart
Pick up the shards, build a new one instead.

 

Let’s lay down all the rules, you and I.
Let’s see the light that would shine through
The cracks and slits, tell me this is true
Let’s lay down all the rules and break them up.

 

We lay down all the rules, you and I.
Broke them all, you and I.
This madness, this flame,
It was so perfect it burned you down, but I–

 

I am here.
In the shards.
Unscathed with nothing but the wound from your silence.

 

I am here.
You’re nowhere near.
I am here, nowhere near.

Nada

The weight of nothingness.
The sense that something’s amiss;
And not knowing what it is.

The weight of nothingness.
The sense that there’s something I miss;
And the inability so say what it is.

The weight of nothingness.
The sense that nothing is here;
And knowing something must be.

The weight of nothingness.
The calm before the storm.
The quiet before life presents itself again, and
Everything.

17Apr16

We lay down in bed
Together, alone
We lay down in bed
Side by side, not eye to eye, then

Slowly, your hands linked with mine
Slowly, my breath mixed yours

After all these years
After all these time
You still make me weak in the knees
Still get lost in those eyes, you said

If this is how it feels to fall,
Why don’t we risk it all?

You see me in the morning
Smile on your lips, frown in your brows
You kissed me goodbye
As I kissed you good night, then

Slowly, your words hurt my eyes
Slowly, my truth broke your heart

After all these years
After all these time
You still make me weak in the knees
Still get lost in those eyes, I said

If this is how it feels to fall,
We could work it out after all.

You said no.
You said no.
You said no.
You said no.

16Apr16

I hear your voice
In the dead of the night
I see you eyes
And how you look to the light.

Oh, it was so good
Oh, it was so good
If only it would last
If only we could last.

I dreamt of you tonight
And your arms around me so tight
Everything seemed so fine
Til I open my eyes and I’m on fire, cos

Oh, it was so good
Oh, it was so good
If only it would last
If only we could last.

It was brief but maybe
That is all there is
I was bad for you baby
And you were bad for me, yet

Oh, it was so good
Oh, it was so good
If only it would last
If only we could last.

14Apr16

They say that it gets worse before it gets better.
They say that I deserve someone better.

Oh, what can I do?
Oh, what can I say?

I’m done believing those sweet words
I’m done holding on as things get worse.

They say that they’ll be different from my past.
They say that this time it’ll last, but

Oh, what did they do?
Oh, what did they say?

I’m done believing those sweet words
I’m done holding on as things get worse

I’m done, I’m done,
I’m done, I’m done,
Oh, I’m done.

Fortnight

If you so ever decide to leave,
If you so ever think that what’s between the two of us,
What we could be, and what we are–
Are nothing compared
To those words and wounds.

 

 

If you so ever decide to leave,
If you so ever think that what’s between the two of us,
What we could be, and what we are–
Are nothing but same old copies
Of how your past had been.

 

 

If you so ever decide to leave,
If you so ever think that what’s between the two of us,
What we could be, and what we are–
Aren’t worth the risk, Aren’t worth the work,
Aren’t  worth abandoning the fears we both share.

 

 

Then–

 

 

Leave knowing it was I who messed it up.
Leave knowing it was I who was being difficult.
Leave knowing it was I who thought wrong.
Leave knowing it was I who tried to make it right.

 

 

But.

 

 

Leave knowing it was you who left.
Leave knowing it was you who said no.
Leave knowing it was you who chose.
Leave knowing it was you who ended this.

 

 

Yet.

 

 

Leave knowing you aren’t worthless.
Leave knowing you aren’t what you think you are.
Leave knowing there is more to you than what you say.
Leave knowing you are worth the heartache I am in.

 

 

Leave knowing it was beautiful.
Leave knowing it was special.
Leave knowing it was wonderful.
Leave knowing it is something I’d never do again.

 

 

Leave knowing it was a wonderful dream.
Leave knowing it was a weekend of what our life could’ve been.
Leave knowing it was unique.
Leave knowing this is something I’d do again.

La Decada

I was too shy then,
A decade ago.
Unaware of how my life would go,
Impervious to the complexities,
Only knowing,
I felt something–
A little happy,
When they said you felt something then.

 

 

You were too far then,
A decade ago.
Unaware of so many things,
If only you knew,
That I knew,
You felt something–
When you used to come over,
Ignore me for a little while.

 

 

We’re so different now,
A decade has passed.
Virtually strangers to each other,
We knew close to nothing,
Just that,
Whatever that was before–
We’re more ready now,
We’re ready now.

 

 

We’re so different now,
We’ve walked diverging paths.
Except for the fact that some things never change,
Some things don’t go away,
It’s just that,
They hide in the backs of our minds, until–
We’re more ready now,
We’re ready now.